So, my good friend forwarded me an e-mail her Dr. Mother-in-Law sent her … with a detailed list of how to have a baby boy.
I think someone wants a grandson…no pressure, girlfriend!
I know how badly you guys want to spread your seed to have a son, so I thought I’d share this (sperm) bank of knowledge. And considering I am scared to make a spawn of me, I am keeping this advice archived so I can try and only procreate boys myself.
So I present to you, a recipe to make a baby boy…
*Sperm with Y chromosome (“boy sperm”) swim faster and die sooner … so you need to be the fastest sperm, Michael Phelps.
*Boy sperm will live longer if Dad’s scrotum is kept very, very cool. Or if boxers are worn … well I guess that answers the “boxers or briefs” question.
*Boy sperm thrive in alkaline environment (in the vagina) …more incentive to drink “alkaline” water, which you can get at most health stores.
So those are the ingredients, but she went on to share how to do the cooking…
Timing is essential. Have intercourse only once, as close to the exact moment of ovulation as possible, or 4 to 12 hours before ovulation.
Do not have intercourse at any other time during the 4 or 5 day period before and after ovulation.
You will know the moment of ovulation from tracking cervical mucous on the calender, using ovulation test strips or tracking basal body temp on the calender.
Favor positions that lead to deep penetration. This allows the faster moving male sperm to reach egg first…so I guess she means do it doggy style?!
And that was your sex-ed lesson of the day…now back to sports.
If you have any questions about, well, anything (obviously), shoot me an e-mail at email@example.com or tweet me @FlashGirlWFNZ
…and you’ve just been flashed