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Ask Flash Girl: Coaching Men On Their Game With Women

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From The Mac Attack

I know it’s hard to meet people these days, and Match.com and bars don’t tend to yield the best results. So you have to get crafty with your pick-up technique. It’s been noted in random blogs and Cosmo articles that a good place to meet people is at the grocery store, so Brett asked me about that: … How do you approach a woman in a grocery store? Is that really a good place to meet someone?

I’ve personally never met anyone at the grocery store, except for the woman running the self-check-out line. But, it is a good co-ed situational setting, kinda like the gym or church is. If you hang out in the produce aisle long enough you’re bound to meet a nice, healthy girl hoping to meet a man to share the food she cooks with. Better yet, why not try the Farmer’s Market. I bet when Whole Foods opens it’s going to be a dating frenzy like the Dowd YMCA.

I’m only being slightly sarcastic, because the only reason you’re not meeting people in these settings is because you’re not interacting with anyone. I’ve loved talking to strangers since “don’t talk to strangers” was one of my rules, but as easy as it seems to me, I know it can be awkward and intimidating to approach a stranger, especially a hot girl. But all you gotta do to cross that barrier is merely start a conversation. Any conversation.

I know it’s hard for men to ask people questions (such as directions), but just walk up and ask us something about groceries. If you’re a clueless man when it comes to things like shopping for food and cooking you scream that you’re in the market for a woman, because you clearly don’t have one taking care of you. Whereas a man with a grocery list in hand screams “I’m married and shopping for my wife’s honey-do list.”

But whatever you do, don’t walk up to her with a honeydew in hand and ask if the melons are ripe. Don’t be a creeper about it! And steer clear of the dairy section … it reminds women of aging, with eggs that expire and cottage cheese everywhere.

Brett also asked …

Boxers or Briefs  - Boxers! Briefs are like wearing a Speedo, and we don’t want to picture you in one. We have a hard enough time seeing past them trying to watch the summer Olympics.

Do you wait 3 days to call a girl  – No! Games are for the stadium, arena, and field. We don’t want you to seem desperate; we just want you to seem interested. If you wait 3 days we might have already written you off. If we gave you our number, it’s because we wnt you to use it. Send a text to say “nice meeting you, hope to hang out with you outside of a bar one day.” It says to us that you’re going home alone and would like to get to know us in a different environment.

QCB asked me “On a first date, is it o.k. to do the “first kiss” at the beginning of the date vs. at the end? That way both parties will be relaxed.

Well that just sounds weird … I mean, maaaaaybe, if you’ve been friends for a while and brewing a sexual chemistry, have finally crossed that line with a date, and just can’t resist each other like in some passionate romantic movie scene. But otherwise first dates are meant for talking, not kissing. I know I’ve personally never done that. And if a guy tried to kiss me right off the bat without getting to know me I’d assume he was only interested in me for that, and thus not be interested in him. The key to planning a great first kiss is simply not to plan it. Don’t try to be a chemist and just let the chemistry happen naturally.

And my brother from another mother, Producer Croghan from our sister station Kiss 95.1 once asked me (on-air), How do you tell your girlfriend she’s gaining weight, without getting slapped?

You don’t! You just make an effort to be healthier yourself to inspire her to be via your actions.Worse than the freshmen 15 in college is the “new relationship lbs” … they’re inevitable between the preliminary stages and honeymoon phase of dating, when all you do is go out to eat and lay around snuggling each other. And then you get comfortable and let yourself go a little bit. So chances are, you’re getting fat too homie! Singling her out for it only makes you look shallow underneath your gut.  The only time it’s ever good to point it out, ever, is if you’re only concern is for her health.

Instead of going out to eat, cook a meal at home. Instead of going to the movies, go hiking or do something active.

And if that doesn’t work, well then you maybe give her a pregnancy test.

Got a question you need answered or a curiosity piqued? Then e-mail flashgirl@wfnz.com … no question is out of bounds ;)

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