I love answering all your e-mails guys … well, all except those making fun of Michael Kidd Gilchrist after our interview this morning on The Mac Attack. The poor kid has a speech impediment, have a heart.
Anyway, thank you for your e-mails and questions, some of you (whom are smart enough to come hang out with WFNZ because it usually involves free stuff and sports) have even been just coming out and asking me questions. This one might be my favorite…
“How do I attract women between the age of 25-30, rather than 55 and up or barely 18?”
~Dude at Tint World for Harley Davidson bike give-away registration
Ahh, so you’re Cougar pray,” I annoyingly responded to a question with a question. I then proceeded to go off on a tangent about how I feel bad for guys. Girls are looking older and older these days. My sixteen year old niece looks the same age as me and even has bigger boobs. I don’t know what they’re putting in the meat, but they also trying to act older too. And doing so by hanging out with older guys. How are you suppose to know who’s under age and not? Guys, act like you’re a bartender … if they look younger than 21, check their I.D!
But about you getting hunted by Cougars …
There is something you men need to realize about Cougars. What 50 year old woman is out at a bar, drunk, single, and trying to pick up men her sons age? A woman who is bitter about men and is looking for one of two things out of you — a hot hook-up with no strings attached that will make her feel like she’s retaining her youth … or a nice guy that isn’t going to trade her in like a car for a younger model. So she’s looking for something new too. Meanwhile, the younger girls just like older guys, period. Hopefully it’s not because you act their age. Your best bet is to just go where women 25-30 hang out, and try and talk to them rather than entertaining the Cougars flirting with you. Be the hunter, not the hunted
“Why do women make such a big deal about us leaving the toilet seat up? Just put it down, it won’t break a nail!” ~Paul of Charlotte
I don’t get it myself … I’m with y’all on that.
Cause you guys don’t complain about us leaving it down!
And you put up with all the products we have monopolizing the bathroom. Between our plethora of face creams, lotions, perfumes, not to mention hair gels, sprays, and oils, we women require more shelf space — so you men can have the toilet.
“Do women dress up for us, or just themselves? Because you know we could care less about what purse you’re carrying.”
~Maurice of Charlotte
Oh, I know. I can’t imagine how unbearable it is for a man to spend hundreds of dollars on a purse, when I can’t even bring myself to. The Coach purse I got as a gift works just as well as the $15 one I bought at Target. Brand names are for status seekers, and that quest is as fruitless as a quest for a woman that is merely motivated by it. I like to make my own style, so typically when I dress up it’s for myself, so I feel confident because that’s what makes me think I look good. But if I wear my skirt a little tight around the butt, and high heels to make my short little legs look longer, it’s because I want to attract a man … not a woman!
“How can I talk my way out of going to see Magic Mike with my girlfriend?”
~Not magical Mike of Cornelius
Ha! Was she listening to The Mac Attack when T-Bone said he was going with his girlfriend?
Is T-Bone messing up your game? Really he’s just the nice guy who is taking one for the team, so he can watch his teams every weekend as his girlfriend joins him without complaint. It’s called compromise. Try it … it might make things a little easier with your Mrs. or Miss. Or, just suggest she make it a girl’s night and even offer to stay in and watch the kids, so she can go watch half naked men parade around while she pretends she’s interested in the plot line. And while she’s gone you can look up Jenny McCarthy’s new Playboy pictures.
How do I talk to my woman about her menstral cycle and learn about it more? ~Said by no man, ever haha got ya!
Ask Flash yourself, send her an e-mail to firstname.lastname@example.org